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Note: This article contains a graphic description that some readers can find overwhelming.
An 88 -year -old mother whose son died during the 1989 Tiananmen massacre even struggled to go to a Beijing cemetery to commemorate her death every June 4, but the authorities still maintain her under surveillance. “Am I so scary?” she asked.
Zhang Xianling is one of the founding members of the Tiananmen mothers group who represents the families of the victims of the repression against the pro-democracy demonstrators who made hundreds, even thousands of deaths. The incident is completed from the public file in China.
Each year, mothers submit a letter to Chinese leaders, calling on the Communist Party to the power to publish files on the incident of June 4, 1989, to award compensation and to hold responsible for managers of murders.
Zhang told Radio Free Asia that it is old, finds it difficult to walk and needs a wheelchair, as long as her physical condition allows it, she will certainly go to the Wan'an cemetery in Beijing on June 4 to pay tribute to her son Wang Nan who died in repression – as a group of mothers does each year.
Last year, on the eve of June 4, her telephone line was cut off and she lost contact with the outside world. This year, from April, she said that she was under close surveillance.
“They (the authorities) keep an eye on me,” Zhang told Rfa Mandarin, telling how during a recent trip outside of Beijing, she returned to the house around midnight and the state security officers called her to say that they would publish someone outside his door.
“At 6:00 am the next morning, they sent someone to keep my door. I don't know why they are so afraid of me. I am 88 years old and I have to use a wheelchair if I have to walk 200 meters. Am I so scary? She said.
Fall
The annual rally of Tiananmen mothers in the cemetery is a provocative act. The public commemoration of the massacre is prohibited in China. An annual candlelit vigil which for three decades marked the anniversary of Victoria Park of Hong Kong has also been silent in the past five years in the midst of a repression against pro-democracy activists since Beijing has tightened its grip on the formerly semi-autonomous territory.
While China has never made public the figures that died or were injured on June 4, Tiananmen mothers published a detailed card in 2009 showing where some of the victims died. Estimates in the number of deaths varied from a few hundred to several thousand. June 4 is also a research term prohibited on the Internet in China.
Zhang’s son Wang Nan was a 19 -year -old student at Yuetan in Beijing secondary school when he was killed by martial law troops at the small hours of June 4 at an intersection north of the Great People's Hall, according to a victims file organized by the non -governmental group, human rights in China. The ball entered the left side of his forehead and came out behind his left ear, leaving a ball hole on the back of the motorcycle helmet he was wearing.
The troops buried the body of Wang Nan with others in a shallow tomb west of the Porte de Tiananmen, but heavy rains washed the ground a few days later. His body was taken to a morgue to the hospital and was first cheated like that of a soldier when he recently returned from military training and wore a former military uniform. His family was unable to recover his body until June 14, and his remains cremated were buried in the Wan'an cemetery.
Promise not to see journalists
Thirty-six years later, and the anniversary of the death of Wang Nan is still looming in Zhang's life and remains politically sensitive.
Zhang said she had protested the frequent deployment of the guards by the authorities at her door. She said that a policeman she had contacted on this subject had urged her to see journalists.
“They asked me to promise not to see journalists and not to say anything, I said:” I can't do that. “I said that if I spread rumors and you stop me, I have no objection.
Zhang said she felt very sad every year when the birthday of her son's death approaches and the pain of losing it will not be diluted or erased by the years.
“Between April and June, if the current government did not say that it was a sensitive period, I would (always) be sad,” she said. “As a mother, it is impossible for me to forget, especially such a sudden death.”
“Pain is deeply engraved in my heart. It is different from original grief. It is a kind of pain. One is the pain of disappearing it (him), and the other is the pain of not having resolved this question.”
'I will not stop fighting'
Zhang said that members of Tiananmen mothers are dispersed and cannot meet often, but to judge by the number of people who sign the open letter each year by asking for answers, many families of the victims are as committed as it has reinforced his belief and his determination.
“I will not stop fighting,” she said. “We want to ask those who died during the June 4 incident. We have this firm conviction, so we have persisted so far. I just want to tell my children that mom persists, and also to tell the authorities that we always persist. ”
Zhang added that regardless of the power of the regime, he cannot completely erase what happened.
“The massacre (June 4) took place at the sight of the public, so it is not something that will be easily forgotten. Although the candles of Victoria Park (Hong Kong) were blown away by the strong wind, the spark of justice always burns in the heart of each person with a conscience,” she said.
“As long as there is a spark and a person who commemorated, this is significant for our family … No matter the number of people, it is a kind of comfort and support for us, and it also gives us a spiritual force.”
Edited by Mat Pennington.